Too Late, Baby?
by Robinpoppins
Summary: Lorelai returns to Stars Hollow with her 18 month old daughter after being gone for more than two years. The story chronicles the new chapter of Lorelai's life with flashbacks explaining how she got there. Eventually LL, alternate view of 6th season.
1. Home Again

**Summery: Lorelai comes back to Stars Hollow with her 18 month old daughter after being gone for more than two years. The story chronicles the new chapter of Lorelai's life with flashbacks to what brought her there. LL, Post 6.1.**

**Disclaimer: I wish I could come up with something cute to say in my disclaimer, but I'm sleepy. I swear by my Luke's Diner Sign that Gilmore Girls is not mine. Hey, I kinda rhymed. Yikes...bikes!**

**Assumptions: This story takes place a little more than two years after 6.1. No long-lost daughter, aka April,for Luke (let the Hallelujah Chorus ring from sea to shining sea). No Paul Anka. No romantic entanglements with a certain namless individual (_cough_, Christopher, _cough_) whose character has officially burned all my faith in him after the season 6 finale. **

* * *

**Too Late, Baby? **

* * *

_"And it's too late, baby, now it's too late. _

_Though we really did try to make it."_

- Carole King, "It's Too Late"

* * *

**Chapter 1: Home Again **

_I won't be happy till I see you alone again _

_Till I'm home again and feeling right _

- Carole King, "Home Again"

* * *

The blur of passing trees. The whooshing noise made when her tires made contact with the asphalt. The faint scent of old fast food drifting past her nostrils. The bitter trace of coffee still on her tongue. The feel of her fuzzy leopard steering wheel cover between her fingers. This was the thrill of the road at its best.

Lorelai Gilmore had never been one to like taking long road trips. She never took them as a child. Her parents always flew first class to every vacation destination. She could remember sitting engulfed by a big blue chair, nose pressed against the airplane window, imagining what it might be like to dance on the clouds. Now, only two road trips stuck out in her adult life. Only one of which was enjoyable. Rory had been there. That was probably what made the difference. The second one she took alone. The white lines to the right of her dragged on, seeming to trail into infinity. She hated thinking about that trip now. It was rash. She was scared. She needed to run. She made a mistake.

* * *

_Lorelai felt encompassed by silence and darkness in Rory's empty room. It felt like a bottomless pit. Even when Rory went to Yale, it never felt completely devoid of Rory's stuff and overall presence. She would be home on the weekends. But now, Lorelai wasn't so sure. Rory was gone. Lorelai felt betrayed. She knew better than her parents that Rory would need to go back to Yale on her own. Nothing the three of them could do would convince Rory now. Lorelai so felt naïve by thinking that she could get her parents to stand by her side and help talk sense into Rory. It would never have worked, she knew that now. Hindsight was hindsight. Rory was her mother's daughter. She needed to make her own way. And Lorelai had never felt more helpless. She had gotten the water bottle out of the fridge in order to get rid of the lump forming in her throat, but so far, it only made her feel worse. _

_She was supposed to be happy. She was engaged after all. Engaged to a man that she knew she wanted to spend the rest of her life with. Without Rory, the joy of the situation was not present in the form that it should be. She should be jumping up and down and screaming. They should be browsing wedding magazines and deciding on colors, dresses, flowers, invitations and cakes. The three of them should be spending time together, like a real family. But, life didn't work out the way it was supposed to be. It never did. A sob escaped. She could do nothing to keep the tears from escaping her cloudy blue eyes, just like she could do nothing to point Rory in the right direction. Rage swelled in her fingers. She flung the water bottle against the wall and cried into her hands. The door slammed. Luke's voice. _

_"__Full moon! Moment's here, let's go!" She furiously attempted to wipe any evidence of her sob fest from her face. It would probably all be in vain. Luke would know. He always did. So, she got up and met her fiancé at the door. _

_

* * *

_

This trip was different. That thought was clear in Lorelai's mind. Before, the last time she drove across the country, she had been heavy with anger, gloom, loneliness, and despair, and the trek seemed endless. If she hadn't reached the ocean, she would've kept driving. Now, it was completely different. Her heart wasn't burdened. She felt free and even happy. She took a different route. She made countless stops along the way. A national park here, a tourist trap there, a mall stop every time she felt that the clothes in her suitcase were becoming stale. Lorelai didn't know when she would get this opportunity again, so she decided to go wherever the road led her. Her U-Haul trailer happily trudged behind her, pulled by her new Jeep Liberty. It was red. Bright red. A color she always wanted for a car but never dared to get. This was a new chapter of her life, even though she was going back to where she started. This trip was bringing her back home. Probably for good.

The kelly green road signs she passed along the way became her best friends. Grand Canyon National Park- 12 miles. Las Vegas- 40 miles. Colorado State Line- 2 mi. Mount Rushmore- 30 miles. Chicago- 15 miles. Mall of America- next exit. Canadian Border- 3 kilometers. Philadelphia- 115 miles. Hartford- 20 miles. Stars Hollow- 3 miles. Her heart leapt at the last one. Exhilaration seemed to ooze out of her pores. An antsy desire to keep moving pulsed through her veins and surged in her hands and legs. She turned up the CD. She drummed her fingers on the steering wheel. She couldn't wait to get out of the car. Lorelai glanced in her rear view mirror. The sleeping baby snuggled in her car seat brought a smile to her face. This little girl had brought her the feeling of home in the two years that she had been away. She was Lorelai's reason for hanging on. Why she didn't succumb to depression when her life didn't go as planned. The main reason why she was returning to Stars Hollow. She was like baby Rory, who had inspired her to start a life of her own. Two daughters. Two very different outcomes. Two very different periods in Lorelai's life.

"We're almost home, Kakers." She said to the sleeping girl. Kakers or Kate, as she was officially known, stirred slightly and sighed, but continued to sleep. _For a girl who doesn't like to nap, the road sure makes her tired. I should take her for drives more often. _

Kate and Rory were both similar and worlds apart. Both were happy babies who were innately attached to their mother. Rory, however, could be moody and even bratty at times. Kate had a streak of independence, something that hadn't shown up in Rory until she was much older. She was also more daring, sometimes scaring Lorelai to death. Kate was stubborn, wanting nothing in her way when she had set her mind to accomplishing something. Something she had picked up from both her parents. The differences were also seen in the two girls' appearance. Rory had been bald when she was born and then grew patches of dark hair, looking just like Lorelai. Kate had Lorelai's beauty and general appearance, but was a toe-head with spiral curls. It was funny; Kate came out of the womb with a mass of jet black curls. Black turned to red later, and red suddenly changed to white-blonde. Lorelai had been shocked by this at first, but she learned that her 18 month old still managed to surprise her every once in awhile. _Probably got that from her father._ Lorelai had known him for over a decade and he still could floor her with things she would never expect. Most of the time, she could see more of Luke in Kate than she ever saw of Christopher in Rory.

Brushing thoughts of Luke aside for now, Lorelai pulled onto the exit, feeling her foot grow heavy. She felt the need, the need for speed. She made brrrr noises with her lips, which usually hurled Kate into a fit of giggles. This baby was easily amused. Instead, Kate blinked awake and looked around. She was hardly ever grumpy when she woke. She looked into her daughter's eyes. That was clearly Gilmore blue.

"Hey there, sleepy head."

"Hi Mommy," Kate murmured while rubbing her eyes, fascinated by the world around her. She was starting to talk in two word sentences now. Lorelai was happy that she could finally pass on the gift of gab to her youngest daughter. If she was anything like Luke, she would pick up on ranting and keep Lorelai amused for years to come.

Lorelai decided to take the long way through Stars Hollow to her old, but soon to be new again, house. She chose to drive by the Dragonfly first. It was definitely a sight for sore eyes. She had missed it. She felt proud when she thought about all the work she put in to make it happen. She felt sad that being on her own banished her from her dream for two years. She felt uncertain that things hadn't gone her way while she was gone. Hell, she wasn't even sure that Michel would back down to let her run the inn again. Maybe they could attempt to be partners. Michel deserved to be a partner after everything he had done over the years.

"That's Mommy's inn, Kakers. That's where Mommy is going to work."

"Mia?" Kate questioned. In her mind, Mia and inns were automatically associated.

"No sweetheart. Mia's inn is in California. Our old home. This is our new home."

"Oh," Kate stated in her sweet voice. 'Oh,' had quickly became a favorite word of Kate's

She turned the Jeep and made her way toward the center of town. Some things never changed. Then again, maybe not. Al's Pancake World was painted lime green. _Taylor__ must've had a conniption. _

"Doggies! Woof woof." Kate squealed with glee, pointing outside of the window. Sure enough, the lawn around the gazebo was filled with cages of dogs and cats. Banners read 'Connecticut Humane Society. Adopt a pet today!' Kate was definitely Lorelai's daughter.

"Oooo, puppies. Look at 'em Kate. Look at that one. He's so cute. And kitties. What do kitties say?"

"Meeoooooow, meeooooooow."

"Good girl."

"Go Mom-my?" Lorelai saw Kate point out the window. Her daughter had already mastered the pouty face. Lorelai hesitated. She could see the diner sign. It wasn't a good idea to stop yet. She needed to see Luke first.

"Uh, no hon. Let's go to the house first. Maybe Rory can take you later."

"Wowy!" Kate screamed, hands thrown up in the air. She absolutely adored her older sister.

"Yeah, Rory is meeting us at the house later. We are going to go to the park."

"Oh." Kate continued to look out the window as Lorelai maneuvered out of the town square and through the residential streets. Kim's Antiques. Sookie's house. Taylor's house. Kirk's mother's house. The Forrester's house. "Mommy," Kate spoke up, then gestured. Chubby fingers formed a bud and she pressed the tips to her mouth, "Hungwee."

Mia had insisted that Kate should learn baby sign language after watching a program on the Today Show. Something about babies with deaf parents learned to communicate faster because babies could use their hands before they could vocalize. "If Katie Couric said it, then is must be true," were Mia's exact words. She bought a book. She practiced with Kate for hours. MOTHER, EAT, GRANDMOTHER, BABY, DRINK, HOME, ME. Lorelai's contribution had been POOP. Mia wasn't too happy about that, but it made Lorelai laugh when Kate caught on. She also tried to teach her COFFEE and PIZZA, but they were hard signs to simplify for baby hands. Kate still used her signs every once in awhile, but now preferred to vocalize.

"Oh, I'm sorry sweetie. I didn't even realize it was lunch time. When Rory gets here, we'll go get something to eat." She was met with silence. "Almost there." She still had that antsy feeling. Lorelai was pretty sure Kate was getting it now too. She sped up.

* * *

_"I'm worried about you," Luke confessed while he and Lorelai lay in bed together one late night. She was in his warm arms, their legs tangled under the sheet. He knew she wasn't asleep. He knew that she hadn't been sleeping well for awhile now. He knew she had been a little overly emotional lately. He could always tell when she was crying, even when she fought so hard to hide it. He knew Rory's departure had hit her hard. Hell, it hit him hard too. He was going to be her step-father, after all. It had been a month since Rory left. _

_"What?" Lorelai asked, turning on her side to face him. Panic pulsated through her limbs. Luke always knew. _

_"I'm worried about you," he said with his normal soft, gruff, bedroom tone. Luke's fingers reached up and tucked a stray lock of hair away from her face. _

_"I'm fine." _

_"No you aren't." _

_"I'm-" _

_"Don't say you're fine. I know you aren't." She dipped her chin down as she tried to avoid eye contact with him. Luke's eyes had the ability to hypnotize her thoughts and make her confess things that she was not expecting. She wasn't ready to talk. She couldn't even wrap her own mind around what had happened with Rory. She needed Luke to be her release, not her constant reminder. Luke sighed as he watched more hair escape from behind her ears and tumble across her face. "I want you to be able to talk to me about this," he continued. _

_"Talk about what? I have a great Michel story that I was saving for a rainy day, but if you are extra nice to me, I might give you a few hints." _

_"Lorelai." _

_"Alright, impatient one. Keep Michel, doughnuts, split pants, and a shiny man thong in mind for later. I need to work on my Michel voice a little more. _

_"I want you to talk to me about Rory." Lorelai's seemingly excited mood quickly changed to somber. She had tried to change the subject. Luke wasn't going to back down. She sighed. _

_"I can't." _

_"You won't." _

_"Okay…I won't." _

_"Then I'll talk. I know when Rory left, it hit you hard. You wanted Rory to stay at Yale. You want Rory to have the chances that you didn't have. You probably feel like you worked hard for twenty one years for nothing. Twenty one years to have your daughter go behind your back and betray you. I also know that you want her to go back to Yale herself." Lorelai turned on her side to face away from Luke. She didn't want to talk about it. She wasn't ready to talk about it. "Lorelai, this is tearing you apart. I can see it. You miss her. This whole house reminds you of her. This town reminds you of her. Hell, even our engagement reminds you of Rory. I can't just stand by and watch you crawl closer into yourself everyday. We're getting married. I want you to be able to talk to me about this." Luke took a breath and waited for Lorelai to respond. She shifted in bed a bit and met his gaze. She felt like she was on the verge of tears again. _

_"You think I don't know all of this," Lorelai snapped, but immediately felt guilty. Luke was trying. She hadn't said much to Luke about the whole Rory situation, and he hadn't pushed her reasoning until now. She should have told Luke, even if he already knew what was going on inside her head. They were getting married. Once, she had withheld things from Luke and she ended up alone and heartbroken. Lorelai felt that she needed to learn to put her entire trust into her fiancé, even if that had always backfired with her previous relationships. "You're right," she said, hoping it would make up for her last insensitive comment. _

_"You should go away for awhile," Luke suggested after a few moments of silence. _

_"Excuse me?" Of all the things swirling in her mind of what Luke could've responded to her, this was not one of them. _

_"I think you should go away. Get out of town. Think about the Rory situation. Try to come up with a course of action. Do, uh, girl stuff." Lorelai smiled slightly. She reached for Luke's hand and laced their fingers. He brought his hand to hers and kissed it softly. "I just think it will be good for you. You can clear your head. Maybe even get some wedding stuff done. I think it might really help clear your mind." _

_"Where would I go?" How could she possibly label him a loon when he was being so sweet? _

_"I don't know. Um, well, there's a place I know in Vermont. I think you might like it for a few days. I could give them a call if you want." _

_" Vermont sounds nice. Can't remember the last time I was there. Ooo, wait, I remember seeing Billy Idol on the slopes when I was 14. That was a day." _

_"Please don't sing White Wedding." _

_"Oh, come on Luke…it's a nice day for a…white wedding. Come on it's a nice day to…START AGAIN!" _

_"Jeez. Are you done?" _

_"Yeah." Lorelai paused and searched Luke's face for the expression that always comforted her. "You would be okay with me leaving like that for awhile." _

_"I'm the one that suggested it. Like I said, I think it would be good for you. I don't like seeing you like this." _

_"Okay, then… I'll go. Do you want to come with me? It'll kinda be like a pre-wedding honeymoon. A new moon? Don't know the proper terminology." _

_"Tempting as that is, I think it would be better if you did this alone. But, you can call me." _

_"Deal. I guess I could leave on Tuesday, because my inn schedule is pretty clear after that. I need to talk to Sookie, though." _

_"I already talked to her. She thinks it's a good idea too. Suggested the place in Vermont." _

_"You are very sneaky Ethan Hunt." _

_"One of my many facets," Luke said with a smirk. He lowered his body back to his original position and felt Lorelai cuddle into his arms. They were still holding hands. He kissed her goodnight and dreamed about taking Lorelai fishing in Vermont._

_

* * *

Lorelai pulled up to the front of her old house. Her new house. Everything that was old felt new again. She felt her breath catch in her throat. Suddenly, she didn't want to be out of her car anymore. Memories of when she last left this house flooded her mind. The night Luke confessed that he was worried about her and thought she should go away to clear her head. The day she left. Luke's arms around her. Jeep packed to the brim. Luke making sure that she had emergency provisions. The ominous feeling that gripped her heart as she waved goodbye to her fiancé. _

* * *

_"Looks like I'm all set." Lorelai stated triumphantly as she placed her purse and CDs in the passenger seat. There was no way she was forgetting her CDs this time. Luke lay under her car. He seemed to be checking the tires. _

_"When was the last time you got these rotated?" _

_"Um, probably…Mamablamabama." _

_"Lorelai! You're supposed to get them rotated every 5000 miles." _

_"Yeah, well, I dare to be different." Luke got out from under the car and brushed the grass off his flannel. Lorelai caught the spots he missed on his back, winking at him when she brushed his ass. _

_"Well, despite the tires, the oil is checked, the windshield wipers are replaced, and I got you a new air filter. Your Jeep's ready." _

_"Well, I guess that means I'm ready to go." She suddenly didn't want to go. Maybe not suddenly. She had been dreading her departure all morning. She felt nauseous. _

_"Got the directions to the inn in Vermont?" _

_"In my purse. Are you sure it's not a B and B?" _

_"I asked the guy three times, and all three times he assured me that it wasn't. Still feeling sick?" _

_"A little, but I think it's just nerves. I don't think I've ever taken a trip by myself before. I wish you would come." _

_"We've had this conversation already. You need time by yourself." _

_"I have a bad feeling," she confessed, surprising herself. Luke pulled her into his arms and kissed her forehead. _

_"You'll be fine. I put coffee and a 7-up in your cup holder. I put a bag of my coffee and a mug in your suitcase. Saltines in your purse." _

_"You're looking out for me," Lorelai said, smiling sweetly. _

_"Kinda my job." He lifted her chin and kissed her softly. They held each other close as the kisses became deep and tender. They pulled apart reluctantly. Luke took her hand and led her to the driver's seat, opening the door for her. She grabbed his hand through the window. _

_"Take the I-48. Less traffic." _

_"Yes sir, Navigator Ned." _

_"Come home soon." _

_"Tomorrow?" she asked innocently, fluttering her eyelashes. _

_"Jeez, give it a few days, will you?" _

_"Are you trying to get rid of me?" _

_"No," he said with a sigh. He didn't want to be without her for a few days, but he knew this is what she needed to do. Being away would help Lorelai. "If I wasn't convinced that this is the right thing to do, I would ask you to stay." _

_"Alright, I guess I'm off then." _

_"I guess you are." Luke leaned in and kissed her on the lips, then forehead and let go of her hand. Lorelai started up the engine. "Drive safe." _

_"I will, hon. I'll call you when I get there." Luke nodded and picked up his hand to wave. _

_"Bye Lorelai." _

_"Bye Luke," she responded, backing out of her driveway. Lorelai hesitated slightly before shifting into drive. Giving her house and Luke a once over one more time, she shifted and pulled away. It didn't take long before she had left Stars Hollow behind and cruised on the freeway. She took a saltine out of her purse and hoped it would calm her stomach down. Damn nerves._

_

* * *

_

"Mommy?" Kate questioned. They had been sitting in silence for about three minutes. The car was off. Silence.

"Here we are sweetie. Home."

"Oh," Kate said. Lorelai sat a few moments more then unbuckled her seat belt and stepped out of the Jeep.

* * *

**A/N: So, I have officially revamped the first three chapters of this story in order to inspire me to continue writing. I am really having a hard time getting motivated to write the remaining eight chapters that I have in mind for this story. Blame the season 6 finale, it's worked for me so far. Thanks for reading reviewing, great reader friends. I will try harder to find my muse. **


	2. So Far Away

**Chapter 2: So Far Away: **

_Traveling around sure gets me down and lonely. _

_Nothing else to do but close my mind. _

_I sure hope the road don't come to own me. _

_There's so many dreams I've yet to find… _

_But you're so far away. _

– "So Far Away," Carole King

* * *

Opening the door of her Jeep, Lorelai inhaled the air around her. She missed that smell. Raking her fingers through her curls, she let her gaze fall on the house. It looked the same, but it looked different. Magenta wisteria still graced the eaves, but the house had been painted. That was no surprise. Sookie had told her as much when she was away. Rory had confirmed it when she stayed there for awhile after moving out of the elder Gilmore's home. The beautiful chuppah was in the same place, scarcely changed by time. Enhanced by the same wisteria. She suddenly felt overwhelmed with emotions. It felt good to be home. She opened the back door and began to unhook Kate from her restrains. Kate gave her a toothy grin.

"Well, what do you think? Do you like our house?" Kate nodded eyes wide in fascination, "Well, it's no Versailles, but I can't believe I ever wanted to live anywhere else." Lorelai unfastened the seat belt and Kate's arms immediately went up, desperate to be held. She was affectionate and after hours of being separated from her mother by a seat, she was needy for attention.

"Up we go," Lorelai stated, then spun her daughter around, much to her delight. Kate squealed and giggled until Lorelai was dizzy and had to stop. Kate couldn't stop laughing.

"Ah-gen," Kate managed to spout out between laughs.

"Hon, Mommy isn't 25 anymore. Give her a breather. But, keep the age just between you and me. I like to think that I am still young and desirable." Kate patted her cheek," Kiss," Lorelai said, and Kate gave her a slobbery peck on the cheek. Lorelai returned one on her daughter's forehead, before setting her down to retrieve a box from the backseat. She nearly hit her head on the Jeep's roof when a door slammed and a raspy voice yelled into the quiet air.

"Lorelai? Oh, it is you. Lorelai! MOREY, I'M GOING OUT!" A pleasantly plump blonde woman ran down the stairs of the neighboring house and toward Lorelai by the Jeep. She quickly put the box back and went out to meet Babette. _It's been too long. _

"Babette!" She yelled back and the two women met in the middle. Babette excitedly wrapped Lorelai in a big hug and slightly jumped up and down with her arms still around her middle. Kate toddled over, interested in what was going on with her mother and the strange woman.

"Oh, Lorelai shuga, we missed you around here," Babette stated, releasing Lorelai finally, "The town really needs you, you know. Things have certainly been less interesting for awhile." Kate tugged on Lorelai's jeans, "Oh sugar, is this your little girl?" Babette asked when Lorelai picked Kate up.

"Yep, sure is. Kate, say hi to Miss Babette."

"Hi." Kate responded obediently, wide eyes filled with curiosity.

"Oh, isn't she the cutest thing. Looks just like you. Oh, but looks like she's got a bit of Luke in her too. Can I see her?"

"Sure," Lorelai said, handing Kate over to Babette.

"Doll, I've seen pictures of you since you were a tiny thing, but I've been wanting to meet you for ages. We sure missed your mom and sister." Babette cooed to Kate, who was all smiles, patting her cheek. "Lorelai, does that U-Haul mean your moving back?" Lorelai smiled. She had been waiting for that question. She liked seeing Kate in Babette's arms. She missed this whole crazy town.

"Yes, it does. I missed you too Babette."

"Oh, that's good news. I'll have to tell Patty. Oh wait, haven't even told Morey yet. MOREY, LORELAI'S MOVIN' BACK!" Kate scrunched up her face with the yell and Lorelai shot her a sympathetic look. She held out her arms to her mother and Babette released her.

" COOL. HEY LORELAI!" was Morey's yelled response, soon followed by the melodic sounds of the jazz piano. Lorelai raised an eyebrow.

"Would you listen to that, shugas? He's playing your song," Babette said with a nod.

"We have a song?"

"Oh yeah. Morey was very depressed when we found out that you had gone to California and Rory was gone. He always thought of you two as secondary daughters. Heck, hon, I did too. He just sat at his piano and this song came out. But, he's picked up the pace now. It used to sound slower and sadder."

"Oh wow," Lorelai said in unbelief, "I had no idea that you and Morey cared about us like that. What's the song called?"

"You better believe it. I said it once and I'll say it again, we missed you. Oh, and the song's called 'Lights Out in the Crap Shack.'"

"Hm, jazzy,' Lorelai responded with her lips turned up in a smile. Kate was feigning interest in the conversation by keeping her eyes on Babette, but playing with the beads in Lorelai's necklace. She slobbered on a few of them over the course of a couple minutes.

"Well, I better go, so you guys can go inside. I saw Rory over here a few days ago, cleaning up a storm. You have such gorgeous daughters. See you later, sugar, and come get me if you need help."

"Okay Babette. Sookie and Jackson are coming over later today, but I may take you up on that offer to help."

"Any time. MOREY, I'M COMIN' IN!"

"OKAY!" Lorelai smiled as she watched Babette make her way back to the house, then looked down at Kate, who was still gnawing on beads. Lorelai bounced her a bit, before bringing the baby to her other hip.

"Alright sweetie, what do you say we go inside and I'll get you a snack to tide you over until Rory gets here and start putting things in the house? Good plan?" Kate nodded, releasing the wet beads, "And, I think I'll take these off."

* * *

_Vermont__ was dull. _

_Day one was spent in the endless drone of the highway. The coffee/7-Up combination made for frequent bathroom stops. The nausea subsided in the afternoon, but the dull ache in the pit of her stomach never left. The trek from small town Connecticut to small town Vermont took longer than it should have. She got to the inn around 6:30, ordered in room service, took a long soak in the Jacuzzi tub, and was in bed by 8. _

_ Lorelai wondered when she got to feel so old. Her daughter was nearly 21. She was pushing 40. She had a plan, and now the only thing that was right in her life was Luke. Luke had never been in the wrong place for her. But, the Rory issue was eating her up inside. Probably where she got dull ache from. It was probably more noticeable now when she was alone because Luke and the inn could distract her from the pain before. She saw too much of herself in her girl. Lorelai had always wanted Rory to take after her ambitious side. The side that was the top of her private school and bound for Vassar, not the side that got pregnant and dropped out of high school. Rory was too smart and too good for that. Lorelai had always made sure that she knew that. Now, things were so screwed up that Lorelai couldn't tell up from down. And there was almost nothing she could do about that. Rory was her mother's daughter. The more she was forced in one direction, the farther she would run from it. Luke had wanted her to come up with a game plan. She had none. There was nothing she could do. Rory would have to make this decision on her own. And, she had known this long before she left the driveway that day. This trip was starting to become pointless, but she would stay. She would stay to make Luke happy. _

_Day two started when the pinkish light of sunrise caused Lorelai to open her eyes. It was too early. She went back to sleep and woke up at 10. She ordered room service, but didn't feel well enough to eat. She munched on saltines and sipped coffee in bed while she watched Regis and Kelly. Katie Holmes was sickening in the interview. _

_Day two also allowed Lorelai to find the Mountain Day Spa. It was just what she needed. A seaweed wrap, massage, and facial later, she felt relaxed. Lorelai meandered through the shops and boutiques. All worse than Le Chat store in Stars Hollow. The diner she came across had awful pie and grotesque coffee and the owner was a robust woman in her fifties, wearing a muted muumuu. She couldn't get away with telling the lady to give her coffee with her pants off. She missed Luke. She missed home. The ache hadn't left. She went to bed early again. _

_Now, it was day three. _

_Lorelai woke up feeling worse than she did the other two days. She almost couldn't will herself to get out of bed. This was the day she had planned on going home, even though things were still unresolved in her mind. Everything still reminded her of Rory. The wedding magazine she picked up at the small grocery store. The movie she rented from the inn lobby the night before. Even the muumuu clad diner owner. This trip did not clear up her thoughts like Luke hoped it would. Rory was such a big part of her life that she was everywhere. _

_She didn't tell Luke of her plans to go home when she spoke to him on the phone the night before. Lorelai wanted to take her time getting home, maybe even stop in Manhattan to go shopping. That way, if she didn't make it back to Stars Hollow tonight, Luke wouldn't worry. She packed her things slowly, fighting the waves of nausea that hit her at different intervals. In the shower, she found herself needing to sit down in order not to get sick. Lorelai couldn't remember the last time she felt this gross. Must've been a bug she picked up before she left. Or, bad apples in the pie she had last night. No matter, she would probably feel better once she hit the road. _

_In theory, that was a reasonable excuse to not stay in bed. On days Lorelai felt sick, getting up and going about her day usually made her feel better. Unfortunately, the road didn't have the same effect. Ten miles out of town she had to pull off the road to vomit. _

_Lorelai was not sure what motivated her to go to Boston that day. She saw the sign and turned the wheel. It was as simple as that. Maybe it was because of the sickness or maybe it was because Boston was closer to her than Stars Hollow. It could've been the fact that if anyone understood the pain she was going through, she thought it would be her daughter's father. But, that probably wasn't it. This was despite the fact that she still held reservations about seeing him again. That she still hated him for wanting her to break up with Luke. That she knew Luke would not be a happy camper when he found out where she was. So Lorelai didn't allow herself to think about what she was doing. She just went._

_

* * *

_

"Mom?" Rory's voice rang out in the entryway of her house. It felt good to see her mother's car in the drive again. The house was not a home without Lorelai.

"Kitchen!" Lorelai called back, munching on bananas and crackers with Kate. Her baby had a surprising love for fruit. It was a habit Lorelai fought hard to break, but stubborn Kate was too much like her dad. So, Lorelai knew that if she couldn't beat her, she should join her every once in awhile It would probably be healthier for Kate in the long run. _God, when did I start sounding like Luke? _

"Hello?" Rory called from the living room, dumping her overnight bag on the couch. Her grin was big. Lorelai jumped out of the chair and ran into the next room to embrace her adult daughter.

"Hey daughter!" She excitedly said into Rory's neck, gripping her daughter's middle tight.

"Hi…Mom…can't…breathe!"

"Breathing is over-rated. Come say hi to your sister." Lorelai grabbed Rory's wrist and led her toward the kitchen. Both women were overflowing with bubbly excitement. The Gilmore girls didn't get to see each other as often since Lorelai went to California, so any moment together was to be treasured. Now that Lorelai was back in Stars Hollow, they could make up for lost time. Lorelai stopped short before going into the kitchen, placing a finger over her mouth. They waited. Curious Kate stopped hearing voices and crawled off the piles of phone books and dictionaries that she had been sitting on. Lorelai and Rory heard her socked feet toddle around the kitchen and finally into the hall. She snuck around the corner and ran right into Rory's legs. Kate's inquisitive expression changed into sheer joy when her eyes went up to look at Rory. She immediately flung her arms up to be held.

"WOWY!"

"Hey kid," Rory said, whisking Kate up into her arms, "Kiss," Kate gave her a slobbery, banana flavored kiss on the cheek. Lorelai smiled as she watched the scene unfold before her. She cherished the moments when her two daughters were together. "What's all over her hands?"

"Ah, looks like bananas. Alright Kakers, let's get those hands washed." Rory scrunched up her nose as she followed her mother into the kitchen.

"Gross," Rory said to Kate. Kate just giggled. Lorelai took the reluctant younger sister out of Rory's arms and stuck her hands under the kitchen sink.

"So kiddo, how's work going?"

"I think I met Paris' match in my new boss."

"Nazi storm trooper?"

"Pretty darn close."

"You just can't get away from it. I read the new batch of articles you sent me before I left. Some very good writing, missy. I left them for Mia to read."

"How did Mia take you leaving?"

"Overjoyed. She's been trying to get me out of there for months. But, she almost didn't let Kate go. I had the option of coming back daughterless."

"That would've been a pickle." Kate smiled with fascination as she looked at Rory.

"This little girl is infatuated with you," Lorelai said as she wiped off Kate's hands. She immediately thrust her arms out again to be picked up by Rory, "I think I have been replaced."

"Never. I'm just a rare commodity. I don't even know why she likes me so much. I have never been that great with kids."

"Do one of your sock puppet shows. She'll love you forever," Lorelai said with a laugh.

"Shut up."

* * *

_Lorelai found the apartment without difficulty. She could hear The Offspring in the background before she knocked on the door. Typical Christopher. She rapped just loud enough that he could hear her over the music. Footsteps became louder as they approached the door. There was a pause, and then it opened. _

_"Lor?" Christopher questioned. He looked stunned. Lorelai could only remember a couple of times when Christopher wore that expression. The time he crashed his brand new Porsche only hours after receiving it. That day she told him that she was pregnant. The phone call he received from Sherry at Sookie's wedding. When he found Rory and Logan in that compromising position at the disastrous Gilmore vow renewal. She threw him off right now and the funny part was she couldn't even explain why she was there to herself. _

_"Hi Chris." _

_"Of all the gin joints…" he quipped. Humor was a defense mechanism that they both used. _

_"Can I come in?" she asked softly. The smile was gone from Christopher's face. He knew something was up. _

_"I know this usually gets men into trouble," he began as he held the door open for her, "but you don't look so hot." _

_"Didn't get my beauty sleep last night." Lorelai made her way over to his couch, and with out asking, sank into it. She audibly sighed. She felt weak. Christopher came over and sat on the other side of the couch, uncertain of why she was there in the first place and what his next move should be. The last time he saw Lorelai he had been shamelessly drunk and they had parted on bad terms. Unforgivable terms. But, they had a history. They had a child together. No matter what horrible thing Christopher did, they always found a common ground. He never expected her to come to him in this manner, though. Especially looking the way she did. Her face was pale, eyes bloodshot, and clothes slightly disheveled. Something was definitely wrong. _

_"Lor, what's going on?" _

_"I honestly don't know," she began, "I mean I was away and I started feeling sick, but I figured it was stress or nerves. Then I ended up here and I don't even know why. I was away and I couldn't stop thinking about Rory. So, I thought that was making me sick. And-" _

_"Whoa," Chris interrupted, "Slow down. What about Rory?" He didn't know. For a minute, Lorelai had forgotten that he didn't know. She took a deep breath. _

_"She, uh, is taking some time off Yale and moved in with my parents when I told her that I didn't think leaving school was a smart idea." _

_"Wow," Christopher said in disbelief. He ran his fingers through his hair. He suddenly got a horrified look on his face, "God, she isn't…is she?" _

_"No," Lorelai said, a faint smile crossing her lips for the first time that day, "She isn't using our method to get out of school." _

_"Thank God," Christopher stated, exhaling a held in breath. He paused, and then decided he needed more information. "So, I need you to start over here. I got a little lost in the ramblings." _

_"Sorry. It's just…God Chris, when did everything get so screwed up. One minute, Rory's doing great. She was doing well in school, she had the Yale paper, she was happy with her boyfriend, and she got this good internship at a local newspaper with her boyfriend's father. Granted, I wasn't that happiest with the last two things, but she seemed happy and I want her to be happy. Then, the next minute she pulls a Bonnie and Clyde with that smug ass of a boyfriend and steals a yacht! I mean, who steals a yacht? It's big; you can't fit it into a purse. You have to have sea faring skills in order to get it away. She spent the night in jail. I got a call, during dinner with my mother, mind you, to go bail her out. This isn't Rory. She never even shoplifted as a kid. Not even on accident." _

_"Whoa," Chris said again. He was now resting his chin on his palms and slowly rubbed his temples, "That is a lot of information to process in two minutes." _

_"Oh, just wait. Believe me, it gets better. The next day, she drops the bomb on me. She doesn't want to go back to Yale next semester. She doesn't want to be a journalist anymore. She wants to take time off of school. And I was floored. I kept thinking that this wasn't Rory. I wasn't hearing those words coming from her mouth. And I was upset, but I calmly tried to tell her what was going on inside my head. That I regretted not having the opportunity to go to college, even though things worked out for me. That I didn't work my ass off for twenty years for her to cop out like that. Not my exact words, of course." _

_"Of course." _

_"But, I can't get through to her anymore, Chris. I've felt the 'mom-card' slowly fall from my grasp." Lorelai paused to catch her bearings, " So, now we come to the part where Lorelai makes her mistake. Lorelai has a talk with her parents." _

_"I could've warned you about that one." _

_"Believe me, my other half was screaming, 'don't do it, don't do it!' the entire time. The funny thing is, I actually believed that they would help me talk sense into Rory. Of course, they didn't believe the indiscretions of their angel grandchild at first, but I thought we wound up on the same page. We had a plan. We all didn't want Rory to drop out of Yale. Then…" _

_"Gilmore's strike again?" _

_"Gilmore's strike again." They were quiet for a moment. Christopher raked his fingers through his waves again, trying to process every tidbit coming at him. _

_"How long has Rory been gone?" _

_"A month." _

_"Hasn't gone crazy in the Gilmore House of Fun yet?" _

_"She's living in the pool house." _

_"Ah, so it might take awhile for the Emily death rays to hit her." _

_"Exactly." They became silent again. Lorelai had forgotten about the music in the background, but it made the pauses not quite so uncomfortable. _

_"You still haven't answered my question," Christopher prompted, breaking the silence, "I don't think you came here just to tell me about Rory. You normally would've handled the situation yourself, and then told me about it afterwards." _

_"She isn't a kid anymore, Christopher. I can't handle the situation. She has to find her own way in this. I was four years younger than her when I did." _

_"What did you mean earlier when you said you were sick? What's wrong with you, Lor?" _

_"I miss her, Chris," Lorelai confessed, fighting back tears, "It's eating me up inside. And while I was home I had the inn and Luke to distract me from the pain. But, Luke was worried about me. He knew something was wrong when I couldn't even tell him. I couldn't tell him what was going on in my head. So, he told me to get out of town. Take a break. Clear my head. Be a Thelma-less Louise. Plan for the wedding a bit," Lorelai saw Christopher wince slightly, "Sorry, I guess I forgot to mention the engagement." Lorelai held up her hand slightly to show the ring. _

_"Luke has good taste," he said gesturing to the ring, but also looking right into her eyes. Then he let his eyes urge her to continue. _

_"I listened to him. I went to Vermont for a few days. And, I just felt gross. Something wasn't right with me. I was off. I was nauseous. I felt weak. Today, I was ready to go home and I had to pull over ten minutes out of town to hurl." _

_"That's not at all disgusting." _

_"I had to pull over four more times. Something is wrong with me and I think I finally figured it out. I thought I was because of this whole deal with Rory, but now I'm not so sure. And then I saw the sign to Boston. I just turned and ended up here. I don't even know why." _

_"So, what's the verdict then?" _

_"I'm late." Christopher didn't say anything for a minute. She continued. "All the signs were there, but I pegged everything on stress. I didn't even notice that I skipped my period until I stopped to think about it." _

_"You're late…You think you are, uh…" _

_"I'm late." Christopher laid his head on the back of the couch, exhaling loudly. _

_"This must be what an aneurism feels like. I think I'm in information overload. Rory. Engagement. You…pregnant." _

_"By the way you're acting you would think it's yours." She felt slightly better getting that information off her chest. It had consumed her thoughts ever since she realized that she hadn't needed a tampon in almost two months. Lorelai thought it would be easier to tell Luke now. _

_"Well, the conversation is vaguely familiar." _

_"Can I ask you something?" She asked after a few moments of silence. _

_"Might as well." _

_"Where can I buy a pregnancy test?" Christopher exhaled again. _

_"I'll do you one better," he said, "I'll get it for you. I could use a drink right about now." _

_

* * *

_

The now three Gilmore girls sat around the kitchen table, sipping some of the boxed apple juices Lorelai bought for Kate. Well, she had bought them for Kate with good intentions. After the first straw/juice incident, Lorelai learned to squirt the juice in a bottle or sippy cup. Kate wasn't quite ready to master a straw yet.

"I feel very juvenile drinking these," Rory commented.

"Yeah, well, beggars can't be choosers. The fridge is empty."

"Yes, and it was very gross. You wouldn't believe what I found in there when I was cleaning the other day."

"Ooo, really, what?"

"Molded butter!"

"Butter can mold?"

"Apparently. At least I think it was butter. The label had some sort of health food inscription. It must've been left by Lu- I mean someone." Lorelai's face changed to serious.

"You could've said Luke. You aren't defending me anymore by not talking about it. Luke and I have a good parental understanding now."

"I know. I guess it's just force of habit. Sorry."

"It's okay, hon. I just need Kate to know that her father and I have a good relationship. I don't want her to grow up with a negative outlook about her dad. That's one of the main reasons I came back."

"Kate's lucky. Luke isn't Christopher."

"Yeah, he's a good dad under the circumstances. I have a lot to make up to him. He deserves to be near his kid."

"I've missed Luke."

"Yeah?"

"I haven't had a decent cup of coffee in ages," Rory quipped. Lorelai smiled. Neither had she "And," Rory began, unsure if she could continue with this train of thought, "I missed him being around here."

"I did too." Lorelai said with a sad smile. _Yet another good thing that I managed to screw up. _

"Mom, I'm glad you're back."

"Me too sweets."

"Talking on the phone just isn't the same."

"No, it's not."

"And, I like that I can see Kate more."

"She'll love you for that, huh baby?" Lorelai ruffled Kate's curls. Kate had been playing with Rory's car keys.

"Mommy, hungry," Kate spoke up. Lorelai glanced over at the clock on the oven.

"Jeez, it's almost two. I'm sorry sweetie. Let's go get you some lunch. You want some French fries?" Kate nodded with a big grin. She loved French fries, almost as much as she loved bananas. "Alright, it's settled. Let's walk to Luke's"

"You're kidding right?" Rory looked incredulous.

"No, it's time we introduced her to the food that we thrived on for over ten years. I could kill for a decent burger right now."

"Mom, are you sure? Does Luke even know you're here?"

"I hadn't told him yet. But, I might as well go see him now rather than put it off."

"Maybe you should call him first."

"Maybe we should just go."

"Didn't Luke call you this week?"

"Yeah, but he always calls on my cell, so there was no way of knowing where I was."

"You probably should have told him you were moving back."

"Maybe, but there's not much he can do about it now. I don't foresee him getting mad about it. He'll get to see Kate instead of just talking to her on the phone once a week."

"But, still…You know what? Never mind. You've already made up your mind about this."

"That's my girl. I'll tell you what. You can take Kate over to see the puppies and I'll go in and talk to Luke. Then I'll call you and we'll all have lunch in the diner. Sound like a plan?"

"Woof." Kate said.

"See, Kate thinks it's a good plan."

"Doggies Wowy." Kate said to reinforce her mother's plan.

"I guess that's okay," Rory said with a hint of uncertainty, "I just don't want to be around for the awkward conversation. You guys haven't seen each other in over a year."

"Yes, but we've talked plenty since then. Like I said, Luke and I have a good parental understanding. Everything will all work out. Trust me."

"Okay Mom. I guess we're off." Rory bent down to pick up Kate, who proceeded to stroke her older sister's sleek straight hair.

"Hi Wowy."

"Hi Kate."

A wave of panic hit Lorelai right then. Any confidence that she had shown a moment before suddenly vanished. She wasn't sure this was a good idea any more. _What was I thinking? Popping up and surprising Luke like that. He's going to hate it. _She hesitated.

"Are we going Memento girl?" Rory asked as she turned Kate around to give her a piggy back ride. She noticed the sudden change in her mother's expression.

"Do you think we should change?"

"You look great, Mom," Rory said with a smirk. After all this time, her mother still fussed about her appearance around Luke.

"Uh, I wasn't talking about me. Kate. How does Kate look?"

"She looks fine too."

"Just fine? Luke hasn't seen Kate since she was born. Maybe she should wear something nicer. Maybe we should make her look mondo-fabulous"

"You know, sometimes I think you really should be diagnosed. You're bipolar."

"Will you just answer my question?"

"Luke's not going to care what Kate is wearing. Frankly, he's just going to be shocked that you are here and happy that he gets to see his daughter."

"You sure?"

"Positive."

"You don't see any banana remains?"

"She's squeaky clean. Besides, I think Luke would like to know that you are feeding Kate bananas."

"I guess." Lorelai's brows were still scrunched. She already could already feel the urge to avoid Luke at all cost. She couldn't do that Kate. _Push through. Get on with it. _

"We don't have to go to Luke's now. We can get you settled here and maybe Sookie can bring us some lunch from the inn."

"No, hon," Lorelai stated simply. She willed her confidence to return," We need to go to Luke's. He won't appreciate it if we go a day without letting our presence known. He deserves to know."

"Alright, so we're going."

"Let's go."

"Doggies," Kate said.

* * *

_Lorelai walked out of Christopher's bathroom after the allotted time. He was waiting for her on the couch. _

_"Positive?" She nodded. Lorelai knew the answer before she took the test. She sat down next to Christopher. He handed her an orange juice. _

_"I could kill for a martini right now." Christopher scrutinized her face. _

_"Are you disappointed?" _

_"That I'm pregnant? No. I always wanted another kid. Luke will make a great dad. It's just the timing. The timing is all wrong. Rory should be here. Luke and I should be married. God, Emily will have a hay day when she finds out." _

_"The mood certainly won't be celebratory at the Gilmore home." _

_"How could I do this again? I mean, getting pregnant once when you aren't married, a mistake. Twice? What do you call it after two times? Al?" _

_"What do you think Luke is going to say?" _

_"He'll be shocked, but I think he'll be happy. I know that behind that 'I don't like jam hands' exterior, he wants to be a father." _

_"So, it's good then." _

_"Yes." _

_"You don't seem enthused." _

_"I just wish things weren't so screwed up with Rory." They were quiet again. Lorelai sipped her orange juice. Christopher opened another beer. _

_"Can I use your phone? My cell is dead." _

_"Sure," Christopher reached over to the table next to him and presented Lorelai with the cordless, "Calling Luke?" _

_"Yeah."_

_

* * *

_

Lorelai, Rory, and Kate stood still at the side of Miss Patty's dance studio. They could see people milling about town. Kirk was walking a dog. No, not walking. Being dragged was the more appropriate term. Lorelai's gaze went to the diner.

"Are you ready?" Rory asked.

"Ready as I'll ever be."

"No circling."

"No circling."

"Just walk in."

"I'll just walk on in. Casual. Like I didn't even leave."

"I'd scratch the last part."

"Alright then, well, you…you two have fun with the puppies and I…I'll give you guys a call in a bit."

"You'll be fine, Mom. See you in a bit. No circling."

"No circling," Lorelai repeated to herself again, almost in a whisper. Then, she took a deep breath and attempted to make her steps confident as she walked over to the diner.

* * *

**A/N: I know that the introduction of Christopher in this chapter was a disappointment to many. I know I have been burned by him recently, like everyone else. But, I've always thought of Christopher as a decent,cute, charmingguy, who would make a great friend to Lorelai. Granted, I don't think that they should end up together (I'm a JJ all the way), but when these two don't let sex get in the way, they really help each other through tough times. So, the whole purpose of bringing in Chris in this story was to be a person Lorelai could use to help clear her head and to talk to about Rory and her pregnancy. I think he understands Lorelai's parents and childhood in a way that Luke, so he's going to automatically understand how it feels for Rory to go behind Lorelai's back and move in with her parents. I'm not saying that Luke doesn't understand, but I feel that Lorelai thinks that Luke won't understand b/c they don't have similar backgrounds. But, enough of my ramblings. Thanks for all the positive feedback. I love you guys!**


	3. You're Still You

**Chapter 3: You're Still You**

_I've loved you for so long_

_And after all is said and done_

_You're still you…_

_Time changes everything_

_One truth always stays the same_

_You're still you_

_After all_

_You're still you_

- Josh Groban, "You're Still You"

* * *

_Breathe in, breathe out. Breathe in, breathe out. _This is what was chanted in Lorelai's mind as she walked from the safety of Miss Patty's into the cold and unforgiving open leading to Luke's Diner. The short, choppy sentences reminded her of the _Karate Kid_. Maybe chanting "wax on, wax off," would have a calming effect. _Wax on, wax off. Wax on, wax off. Wax o-Mr. Miyagi, I'm not_. She was halfway there. After a few seconds, another repetitive and redundant (and repetitive and redundant) phrase popped into her head. _I think I can. I think I can._ All these phrases were bound to give her a headache. She read _The Little Engine That Could_ to Kate the other night. Her daughter loved it and ate the words up like a Hungry Hungry Hippo. Oh, that little girl. She was going to be a lot like her sister. Lorelai hardly ever thought of her daughters as just half-sisters. She liked to pretend that they were real, pure blood sisters that had more than just a mother in common. They had a unique bond, one that Lorelai never experienced herself as an only child. Rory was lucky. Of course, there was always Christopher's daughter, Gigi, Rory' other half-sister. They were practically strangers. Kate and Rory were far beyond that. Kate admired her older sister so. The feeling she had whenever her two daughters were together was something that could never be replaced.

That did it. Her line of thought distracted her long enough and she was now standing in front of Luke's door. _No circling, _she ordered herself once more. Lorelai glanced in the window and her breath caught in her throat. There he was. His red, flannel-clad back was facing away from her, probably fixing something on the back counter. The diner was dead. _That's good, I guess… _She felt her heart start to thump against her chest. It felt like a million butterflies swarmed in her stomach. She dreaded this feeling. She had now seen Luke a total of three times since she had left Stars Hollow. Each encounter was different, but that first glance of him was always the same. For a brief second, she could see everything. Their long history. Their friendship. Their whirlwind romance. Their separate pain. Luke's features and habits that was innately found in their daughter. Lorelai sighed. She had fought so hard to get rid of these feelings in California. It was the hardest thing she ever had to do. And she had. Lorelai thought she could honestly say that she wasn't in love with Luke anymore. But, just for a moment, she forgot this fact. It was Luke, after all.

Lorelai could feel the confidence start to ooze out of her. Half her brain told her that this encounter was no big deal. _You've seen and talked to Luke since you broke off the engagement. You can do this! _The other half begged to differ. _What? Are you kidding yourself? This is Luke! Each time you have seen him has been met with mixed results. Your phone conversations are short and only about Kate. Nothing personal._

With a split second burst of panic, Lorelai glanced over at Rory and Kate. Rory was staring right back at her, waiting to see her go in. Kate, on the other hand, gave her mother no mind. She was nearly bursting out of Rory's arms, hands outstretched. She looked like she was trying to have a conversation with the dog in the cage. Probably a mixture of barks and gibberish. Chains of "woofs" and "yips." Even from across the street, Lorelai could make out Kate's words, "Doggie, Wowy!" Rory absently nodded, but looked right at her mother. Lorelai knew she could see the 'deer in the headlights' look. She had been caught in her hesitation. Rory raised her eyebrows in question. Lorelai shrugged. She and Rory had the ability to role reverse, probably ever since her daughter was four. When Rory acted like a bratty child, Lorelai pulled out the mom-card. When Lorelai acted like an immature juvenile, Rory was the voice of reason and maturity.

"Go," Rory mouthed. Lorelai nodded back. She knew what she had to do here, but that part of her brain wasn't functioning right then. She needed to talk to Luke before the rest of the town bombarded him. Babette already knew she was here and she was almost positive that Miss Patty got the heads up. Next would be Kirk, then Taylor, then Andrew, then Gypsy, the Al…Lorelai placed her shaky hand on the door and pulled it open slowly. _How did things get so complicated?_

* * *

"_Luke's," came the slightly irritated voice on the other end of the line. Lorelai didn't realize it, but her heart had sped up at every dial tone and it was now thundering in her temples. It wasn't so much that she was going to tell Luke that she was pregnant. She now realized that coming to Boston might've been a mistake. A mistake that Luke was going to find out about. She took in a breath._

"_Hey, it's me," she burst out quickly, hoping it didn't sound as shaky to Luke as it did in her own head. Christopher gave her a look. One person who could read her almost as well as Luke was Christopher. _

"_Calm down," he whispered to her. Sure, he was calm now; he had a couple beers. He got to loosen up. An hour ago, he was freaking out too. Lorelai was nervous. _

"_Hey Rachel," Luke stated. She could feel him smiling over the line. He usually scolded her in rant form about only identifying herself as 'me' on the phone. "I mean, it's ridiculous," he usually said, "You could be talking to someone, maybe even say something bad about another person, and it could be the wrong person. Then you're embarrassed. Then he's embarrassed. Who teaches their kids to identify themselves like that?" "It's only a problem if you are dating two people at once. Or if your naive girlfriend thinks she got an STD from a tractor seat and didn't tell you. You should catch up on your TV. They did an entire Seinfeld episode about this exact subject," was Lorelai's normal reply. This usually got Luke into the next rolling rant about television…_

"_Hi! So not funny!"_

"_Yeah, well, that's what you get for saying 'it's me.'"_

"_You should know my voice by now. What other women call you, anyway?"_

"_Uh, my sister."_

"_Liz usually just pops on by. She hardly ever calls you. Admit defeat!"_

"_Never," he said absently. Lorelai liked it when he was playful. It took her mind off the task at hand. Well, almost anyway._

"_What are you up to?"_

"_Pouring Kirk coffee actually."_

"_Quarter caf?"_

"_No, a half 'n half, believe it or not."_

"_Wonders never cease. Tell Kirk I said hi." Luke moved the phone away from his mouth._

"_Lorelai says hi and to stop bothering me." She heard Kirk mutter something like, "She didn't say that. That doesn't sound like her."_

"_I might have embellished," Luke said dryly._

"_Hey, Luke?" She called out to him. She needed to get it out before she lost her nerve._

"_Yeah?"_

"_I need to talk to you about something. Well, run an idea by you, actually."_

"_Um, okay…sure," Luke paused, "Can I call you back, though? The rush is starting to come in." Lorelai looked at the clock on Christopher's wall. 5:15. Damn. She didn't mean to call him when he was busy._

"_It can wait then." Lorelai sounded a bit dejected. She tried not to; it just slipped out. Luke sensed her tone._

"_You okay?"_

"_Yeah, fine. Just got something on my mind."_

"_How 'bout I call you as soon as I can get free."_

"_Great, but my cell is dead and charging in the car so I need you to call me at…uh..." Lorelai gave a frantic look to Chris. He held up his fingers and she rattled the numbers off to Luke._

"_This isn't the inn's number, is it? The area code is different." Jeez, he caught on fast._

"_Well, I'm not exactly in Vermont anymore."_

"_Really. Where exactly are you?" Luke asked, sounding casual. Lorelai still sucked in a breath. Here goes nothing. Being pregnant was nothing compared to this confession._

"_I'm exactly in Boston."_

"_Oh?"_

"_Apparently the city was all the rage with Samuel Adams and his patriots."_

"_The beer?"_

"_Boston Tea Party guy. But, I must say I'm here for the baked beans."_

"_Oh yeah. Where are you staying?" Damn again. She thought she could put this off longer. Lorelai glanced over at Christopher, who was flipping through Rolling Stone and trying not to listen to her conversation. He looked up. "Guest Room?" she whispered to him. He pointed down the hall. She got off the couch and made her way to the room._

"_What was that?" Luke asked._

"_That was nothing."_

"_Who were you taking to?"_

"_That's another thing I need to talk to you about. I need you to promise that you won't freak out until I explain."_

"_I'm not making any promises until I hear what you have to say." Lorelai sighed. Definitely not good._

"_I'm at Christopher's apartment in Boston." Luke didn't say anything for a moment._

"_I'm going to hang up and call you upstairs. We obviously need to talk," Luke said coolly. Crap!_

* * *

DING. The bell above the door sounded as she entered the diner. It was amazing how one sound could stir up so many memories. Lorelai walked past the door frame, heels click-clacking on the floor with her steps. Luke didn't budge, his face still fixated on whatever was on the counter. _He used to turn._

"Be with you in a minute," came the automatic response. His back was still to her. The diner was completely empty. Even Caesar was no where to be found. She tried to soften her steps so her heels wouldn't echo so loud. Lorelai made her way over to the counter and plopped into a stool. Her stool. She allowed herself to look around for the first time in over two years. Everything looked the same. Even the rubber pork chop. A faint smile crossed her lips. Luke was a creature of habit. She racked her brain for how to start speaking. Luke was fiddling with something in front of him, probably a toaster. They liked to act up. Lorelai heard a clank. It sounded like he had dropped something in the slot. "Dammit," he cursed in a gruff whisper. _Say something. Speak up, _said her inner Rory. _Say something. Say anything._

"How 'bout a cup of Joe," Lorelai stated, but not in her voice. It was the deepest, most manly voice she could muster. Very similar to her Dean voice. _Where the hell did that voice come from? It sounded idiotic! What were you thinking? _

"I said I'll be with you in a minute." He sounded frustrated and impatient. _Understandable. Toasters are frustrating. Women using fake man voices are frustrating. Talk normally. _

"How 'bout some coffee for an old friend?" she heard herself say. _Better. _Lorelai attempted to plaster a normal looking smile on her face. She anticipated his turn. She watched his weight shift as he reacted to her voice. He was hesitating. Then, he turned. Luke looked at her full on. Lorelai could tell he was trying to hide the shock from his face. He was searching for something in her eyes. Lorelai hated when he looked at her like that.

"Lorelai," Luke said in basic disbelief. Lorelai was suddenly glad the diner was empty. She was also glad she was sitting. The way he said her name unnerved her. Only he had that ability.

"Hey Luke," was all she could say in response. She could tell he was battling a million questions in his head. Lorelai suddenly felt foolish. She miraculously sounded casual when Luke looked like he was on the verge of a freaked rant. She let her cheeks loosen, trying to make her smile not seem forced.

"So, uh, the diner…looks the same," she began, not sure what else to say. Luke wet his lips, letting his eyes travel around his place. "Yeah, not much has changed," She said. _Terrific, now I'm starting to ramble. _"I was driving all around town today and everything still looks the same."

Luke cleared his throat, "Did you _ahem, _uh, drive by Al's Pancake World?" He was attempting to play off her. To act as breezy as she appeared. If only he knew about the chaotic thoughts that made her brain swell.

"Oh yes. Very unique color scheme. I forgot about that." Luke pulled a rag out of his back pocket and began to wipe off the counter. Lorelai knew that whenever Luke felt uncomfortable, he needed to keep his hands busy.

"Did you hear about Kirk and Lulu?" he asked, avoiding eye contact.

"Oh my God, Sookie told me. I can't believe we are going to have a little Kirk running around here soon. He should not be allowed to reproduce."

"Kirk's not so bad," Luke said defensively, throwing Lorelai off guard, "I mean, it might turn out to take after Lulu anyway." Now, he was trying to cover up his tracks. Lorelai let the comment go. She knew Kirk admired Luke. They were silent for a few minutes.

"I wasn't kidding about the coffee. I could really use some right now."

"I'll make a fresh pot," Luke murmured, glad to have a reason to turn around. _Why is she here? _He needed to know.

"We?" he asked as he spooned coffee into the filter.

"Sorry?"

"You said you couldn't believe that we were going to have a little Kirk soon. Mind if I ask who 'we' is?"

"I just meant us. The town as a whole."

"And you're a part of the town…" he prompted coolly. He didn't mean to sound so bitter. He wasn't anymore. He just couldn't help how he sounded.

"I moved back, Luke," Lorelai said bluntly. She knew what he was hinting at. He slammed the filter container into the coffee maker. She winced.

"Thanks for the heads up," he said dryly. He placed both hands on the back counter, leaning into them.

"It was a last minute decision."

"How long have you known?" He asked, turning to face her now. His left hand was balled into a fist in an attempt to not lose his temper.

"I left California two weeks ago."

"I just talked to you on Friday."

"I'm sorry. It was wrong of me not to tell you."

"Damn right it was," Luke mumbled as he picked up the rag and started rubbing harder on the table.

"Luke, it was also wrong of me to keep Kate from you," she began. Luke stopped rubbing for a second. "I mean I wasn't trying to. I wanted you to be an involved father. But being across the country, I indirectly kept her from you. I kept you from being a dad like you want to be. And, I'm sorry. That was never my intention. So, I decided to come back. I brought Kate to you." Luke didn't say anything. Lorelai took a deep breath, "I know we always said we would discuss custody issues when Kate was a little older, but I'm not in Santa Barbara anymore. We can make these decisions sooner, if you want." Luke nodded. He still couldn't look her in the eye. "Is that, uh, okay with you?"

"I'm not mad about that. You should've told me you were moving back."

"I know."

"Is she here?" He chose this moment to catch her eye.

"She's outside with Rory looking at the puppies, which might have been a bad idea. Gilmores and animals don't mix. " Luke's gaze drifted to the window. He left the counter and walked closer to it. Lorelai got up and followed.

"She's big," Luke stated after a few moments.

"Kids tend to do that to you."

"She looks just like you."

"There's more of you in there then you think." They continued to watch the two Gilmore girls. Rory and Kate were hunched over in the grass petting a small poodle. Kate was talking. Rory was laughing.

"Rory looks like an adult."

"Scary thought, huh?" Luke nodded. They were silent again. "It's good to see you, Luke. You look…you look good." And he did. His appearance was slightly older, but he was still as attractive as she remembered.

"So do you," he said with a sigh. Kate ran away from Rory in the grass, turning around every so often to see if her sister was following her. Rory was following, pretending to run, but really just walking slow. After running a few laps, Rory "caught up" and scooped Kate up in her arms. She then proceeded to spin in small, fast circles. Both girls were giggling. Rory started to waver and then plopped down in the grass. Lorelai broke the silence.

"We really don't have to talk or decide anything now. You can even keep your relationship with her the same. It's all up to you. I just wanted to tell you that we're here. You'll be seeing us around. We may even stop by the diner. You do have the best coffee, after all." She looked over at Luke. A smile crossed his lips as he watched Kate. His daughter. Their daughter. Then, he met Lorelai's gaze.

"I want to be more involved."

"Good…that's good. That's what I hoped you would say." The sound of coffee slapping against the wall of the glass pot made Lorelai jump.

"You still want that coffee?"

"God, yes!"

"Coming up." Luke crossed the floor and went back behind the counter. He pulled out a blue mug from under the counter. It was the one with the chip. Her favorite. The heavenly blend traveled through the air and hit her nose. She was suddenly elated. Luke slid the mug over to her and she snatched it up greedily. Then came first sip.

"You remembered."

"Your disgusting habits stay with some people."

"I missed this. I haven't had a decent cup of coffee in ages."

"I haven't had a true addict in here in ages. Anything else I can get for you?"

"Yeah, actually. Do you mind making lunch for Rory, Kate, and I?"

"It's almost 2:30, Lorelai. You haven't had lunch yet?"

"Nope."

"Jeez. What do you want?"

"Burgers and fries for Rory and I. Wait, make that cheeseburgers. Ooo, and pie. And more coffee. And get Kate, um, some fries and…do you have any peaches?"

"Peaches?"

"Kate likes peaches."

"Yeah?"

"Yeah she does." Luke smiled again.

"Coming right up."

* * *

_The ringing phone jolted Lorelai out of her panic-induced stupor. Luke did not sound happy. As soon as she said the words 'Christopher' and 'apartment' in the same sentence, she could feel Luke's mood shift. Now she was lying on the bed in the guest room, waiting for his call. Each minute that passed felt like a heavy weight being placed on her chest. Luke sure was taking his time. He was probably trying to calm down. She braced herself as she pushed the TALK button._

"_Hello?"_

"_Hey," Luke said, his voice still cold and emotionless._

"_Hi,"_

"_I suppose you are going to tell me why the hell you are in that guy's apartment." Ouch, Luke didn't beat around the bush._

"_I don't know," she said softly. Lorelai didn't even know where to begin. Obviously Luke didn't calm down much before he called._

"_What do you mean you don't know? How the hell could you not know?"_

"_I don't-"_

"_How long have you guys been talking?"_

"_I swear, I haven't talked to him since my parents vow renewal."_

"_Why are you there?"_

"_I don't know. I was in the car, I saw the sign, and without sounding like the lyrics to an Ace of Base song, I ended up here. I can't explain it. I wasn't thinking. I just wound up at his door."_

"_Bullshit."_

"_Excuse me!"_

"_I think I made myself clear."_

"_I thought you were going to let me explain first."_

"_I made no promises."_

"_Well, that's what happened. You can choose to believe me or not."_

"_You know, you could've just told me that you planned on visiting your ex-boyfriend. I might not have understood. Hell, I might've been pissed off. But, hey, at least I would've known instead of thinking that my fiancé was in VERMONT this whole time!"_

"_I wasn't hiding anything! Believe me, I didn't plan on going to see Christopher. It just…happened. I told you, I haven't had contact with him since that night."_

"_When we broke up."_

"_Yes," she said with a sigh, "When we broke up." She should've known Luke would have a hard time understanding. _

"_I guess I don't get it."_

"_No! I was having a hard time cracking that code," she spat back sarcastically. She was starting to get pissed now too._

"_I'm not a complicated man, Lorelai! It doesn't make sense to me when my fiancé wants to willingly spend time with a man she has a long, upsetting history with."_

"_You didn't let me explain," she muttered under her breath._

"_What?"_

"_I needed someone to talk to!" Lorelai blurted out, surprised by her own confession. Her anger was getting the better of her. Her judgment was clouded._

"_About what?" Luke said, words laced with fury._

"_Rory! It was about Rory, okay!"_

"_You could've talked to me about Rory."_

"_There was other stuff too."_

"_Like what?"_

"_I'm not ready to get into that right now."_

"_Stop hiding!"_

"_I'm n-"_

"_Stop! Stop it, Lorelai!" Luke interrupted, "You've been hiding from me. You haven't talked to me about Rory. I was here. I've been waiting. I am so sick of this."_

"_You wouldn't understand!" she shot back, her voice sounding teary. God, this fight was terrible._

"_Try me!"_

"_Chris is Rory's father. He deserves to know what is going on in her life."_

"_No, he doesn't."_

"_Stop pushing it, Luke."_

"_He's not there. He's only Rory's father when it's convenient."_

"_Maybe you're right to an extent, but he's different now. I thought that if anyone understood what I was going through, it would be him."_

"_And I wouldn't! Lorelai, we're getting married. I have been a part of yours and Rory's life for over nine years. Dammit, why wouldn't I understand?" He fumed over the line. He was right. He would understand. He already did understand her. God, why did she have to screw things up all the time? She sucked in a few breaths, trying to get the lump lodged out of her throat._

"_I don't-" she suppressed a sob," I don't know, Luke. I really don't know why I couldn't confide in you. It was just a complex I had."_

"_Jeez, Lorelai. The Christopher issue was one thing, but this is worse. You don't trust me!"_

"_Yes I do!" she yelled back defensively, "You are one of the few people that I can trust."_

"_No, you don't. You say you trust me, but you don't. Your sense of trust is warped. If you really trusted me, we would've talked about this sooner."_

"_Didn't you already know how I felt? You know me."_

"_Of course I did, but it would've been nice to hear it from you."_

"_It was hard." Now the tears had been released with reckless abandon. She could do nothing to stop them. She was so mad. She was so sad. _

"_Life isn't easy. You deal, Lorelai."_

"_Stop it! Don't you think that, of all people, I know how hard life is?"_

"_Yeah, you do to a certain extent. But not when it comes to Rory. You always had it easy with her. She was a good kid. Now, she's rebelling and I know it hurts you. I know. I'm sorry I'm yelling at you like this. But, you're only hurting yourself here. This is doing you no good. You can handle so many things by yourself and I always admired you for that. But, this is different. I want to be here for you, but it's hard when you aren't letting me." They were both quiet then. Lorelai could hear Luke breathing heavy on the other end. This was hurting him too. She was hurting him. She was doing the one thing she had always promised herself that she wouldn't do. And that… that made her stomach churn more than anything. A sob broke out in the silence. She hated that she was crying right then. She never felt so emotionally weak. The pregnancy hormones were kicking in. _

"_I'm sorry, Lorelai," Luke said softly. His voice was calm and even. "Shh…it's okay. We'll be okay."_

"_You're not the one who has to be sorry." She managed to find a tissue in the dark room. How long had they been arguing? "Gah, I am such a mess. I am such a huge, emotionally stunted mess. I don't see why you would want to marry me."_

"_I'm marrying you because I love you. I am committed to you. I am not letting us go this easy."_

"_Luke, you just accused me of not trusting you. If that isn't a basis for breaking off the engagement, I don't know what is." _

"_Do you want to break off the engagement?"_

"_No," she whispered._

"_Neither do I."_

"_I hurt you."_

"_It will happen. But, we work on it and we move on. You just need to learn to talk to me. I'm not looking for a way out. You should trust me. If we can't communicate, then this marriage will never work."_

"_I know," Lorelai's breathing started to even out, but she still felt uneasy. She also hadn't told Luke about the pregnancy yet. "I'll try. Just…give me time. The people in my life haven't always been dependable. Even my own flesh and blood."_

"_I know. Give her time. She'll come around."_

"_You sound so sure."_

"_I know Rory."_

"_Yes, you do." They were quiet once again. Lorelai felt that now was as good of time as ever to tell Luke. However, the urge to chicken out was just as strong. "Luke?"_

"_Yeah?" Here was her chance._

"_I'm late." He paused._

"_For what?" Whoosh, there went her confidence._

"_Never mind. We'll talk more tomorrow."_

"_Are you coming home?"_

"_That's the plan."_

"_Good."_

"_You better go back to work."_

"_You're probably right…I'm sorry I yelled at you."_

"_I deserved more."_

"_No you don't. Get some sleep. I'll see you tomorrow. I don't want you beating yourself up anymore."_

"_Okay, I won't."_

"_Good. Goodnight Lorelai."_

"_Night Luke." She hung up the phone and set it on the nightstand. It was still very early. She wasn't hungry. She didn't want to talk to Christopher. Lorelai felt so drained. The argument took a lot out of her. It was weird; one minute, they could verbally battle it out, but then be able to make amends the next. Luke was always honest with her. He could read her so well. It was frightening. Everything he said was so true that it hurt her to the core. Then, after all that talk of holding back and not trusting him, she couldn't even tell him that she was pregnant. She was so screwed up. Lorelai pulled back the covers and pulled off her pants. After taking off her top, she stuck her toes under the covers. She didn't want to think anymore. Lorelai just wanted to sleep. It didn't matter that it was only 6:00._

* * *

DING.

"What took you guys so long?" Lorelai asked after turning to see Rory and Kate walk through the door of the diner, "I called you ten minutes ago."

"The town happened," Rory stated dryly, handing Kate over to her mother, and then plopped onto one of the diner stools next to Lorelai. Lorelai put her toddler on her lap and planted a kiss on Kate's cheek.

"Mommy!" Kate said.

"Hi sweetheart. How were the puppies?"

"Doggies!" Kate said with a giggle.

"Did you pet some cute ones for Mommy?" Kate nodded, "Did you wear Rory out?" Lorelai asked as she glanced at her oldest daughter. Rory had her arm outstretched on the table and laid her head on the counter.

"Coffee," Rory groaned.

"I think its time you joined a gym. You must be out of shape if you can't keep up with Kakers."

"I can't believe you just told me to join a gym. When was the last time you set foot in a gym?"

"Ah…um…nindyeightyfoor."

"I'm sorry…what was that?"

"1984," Lorelai muttered.

"Ha! I win."

"I do have a point, though. It's not so bad if Kate wears me out; I'm middle aged now. You, on the other hand, are young and spry and should be able to keep up with a toddler."

"To tell you the truth, Kate didn't wear me out as much as the incessant questions from the town mob."

"Cool! You got mobbed? Did the have torches and pitchforks?"

"No, they were armed with, 'Well, Rory, how is your new job? Is this your sister? Where's Lorelai? Don't you think Kate has Luke's chin? What do you think Luke will say when he sees your mom again?' and blah blah blah blah. So many questions! I love this town, but sometimes I'm glad I split my time between here and Stamford."

"They just love you, hon. You are the golden child of Stars Hollow."

"I was kinda hoping the kid here would take my place."

"That means you'll have to renounce your crown."

"That's okay, it gives me crown hair. Where's Luke?"

"He went into his storage shed to see if he still had a highchair."

"Doesn't he normally keep a highchair here?"

"Apparently, he's trying to discourage those Sunday morning baby parades that used to eat breakfast here."

"You mean the ones that breastfed in public. Ew, good riddance." Lorelai dug out a brown, scruffy looking stuffed dog from Kate's diaper bag and handed it to her daughter. Kate's eyes immediately lit up and she held the dog close.

"Doggie," Kate said.

"What's the doggie's name?"

"Callie," Kate replied shyly.

"She's getting better and better with the verbal."

"That's because she's a Gilmore. You started talking in sentences early too."

"You named the dog for her didn't you?"

"Well, she hasn't honed in on her naming skills yet. It was pretty easy; same name as Mia's dog."

"My mistake. You're one to talk about naming abilities. The Crap Shack?"

"Yeah yeah, you're right."

There was a lull in the fast-paced banter and Rory looked over at her mother and sister. Kate talked gibberish to Callie while Lorelai smoothed a bit of the baby's hair.

"How did it go?" she asked after awhile.

"Not bad. A little junior high dance at first, then we eased back into a pattern. You were right; he wasn't happy that I didn't tell him about moving back."

"We only ate here everyday for nine years. I pick up on Luke vibes well."

"Yes, yes, we are all proud of you for that. But, he seems okay that we are here and he said he wants to be more involved with Kate."

"That's great."

"Yeah, I think it is."

"I found the highchair, but I don't think it's suitable for Kate to sit on. How old does something have to be to have lead paint?" Luke asked from behind the curtain of the storeroom.

"Pay no attention to the man behind the curtain," Lorelai jokingly whispered to Kate. Rory's eyes widened and she grabbed a menu to duck her head behind it. Lorelai leaned in to hear what she was saying.

"Luke's coming!" she hissed.

"I believe we already established that."

"What do I say to him? I haven't seen him since Kate was born."

"And you are just thinking of this now?"

"Well, I don't know. I didn't have time to think about it before. Plus, I spent all that time preparing you for the hard part. I didn't even think about where I fit into this."

"You'll be fine," Lorelai assured her just as Luke walked through the curtain with the dilapidated highchair tucked under his arm, completely unbeknownst to Rory. Her head was still tilted and hovering close to the counter.

"Rory…hey," Luke stated rather hesitantly, setting the safety hazard against the wall. Rory was startled by his voice and before she even knew what was happening, her head got a mind of its own and slammed into the counter in scared surprise. Rory reacted quick, shooting up from the counter and rubbing the throbbing spot on her forehead. "Jeez, are you okay?" Luke asked. His expression immediately changed to worry. Lorelai was trying hard to suppress a giggle. Yes, her klutz tendencies were inherent.

"Um…me? Yeah, uh, feel good. The counter is harder than I remembered."

"You sure?" Lorelai asked, hoping Rory wouldn't give her crap about her smile later. She placed a hand on her daughter's shoulder. Kate mimicked her mother's concern, not realizing that it was forced and that she was on the border of pure laughter. Her chubby, toddler hand reached out and patted Rory's hand.

"Wowy bang," Kate announced seriously to Lorelai. She nodded. Rory continued to rub her temple. Luke still looked shocked and concerned. Out of the corner of his eye, he stared at Kate.

"Can I get you anything?" Luke asked. He found the need to keep his hands busy once again.

"It's nothing your coffee can't cure," Rory attempted to say with a laugh. Instead, her voice wavered and sounded shaky.

"Yeah, sure. I'll get it for you." Luke shot Lorelai a concerned glance before he turned away from them. She then reached past Kate for her purse. Out came the trusty miniature pharmacy. No girl should be without one. Well, that and a Tide Pen.

"Kay?" Kate asked her sister. Rory tried to shrug the entire situation off as comical, but the counter really did hurt!

"Yeah, kid. Just feeling a little clumsy today." Yeah, and she just made an ass of herself in front of Luke and her ever-mocking mother.

"Oh," Kate replied. Lorelai passed over the 'pharmacy.' She found Kate's concern adorable. Now she felt guilty for all the Three Stooges and Lucille Ball references that she planned to throw in at Rory's expense the rest of the day. Luke still hadn't said anything about Kate. Lorelai knew that her girl would get curious about the man in the room with them soon. In her head, she started to rehearse childish conversation starters that would introduce Luke. He was someone that she and Rory knew so intimately, that it was weird that her daughter had no visual connection to him. She only knew his voice. Kate would pick up on his voice soon. She was a very observant toddler.

"Hon, why don't you go check the damage in Luke's bathroom. Here, take one of these. Just not the green ones. They make me loopy." Rory took the pill box from Lorelai and made her way over to the storeroom. "Oh yeah, hold onto the railing so you don't pull a Scarlett going up the stairs."

"I will, and I'll even try to throw in a _Sunset Boulavard _entrance for you."

"Just be one 'Mr. DeMille' short of being psycho, kay?"

"Will do." Then Rory disappeared behind the curtain.

"Well, the bang obviously didn't hurt her bantering," Lorelai said to Kate. Luke audibly sighed with his back still to the girls.

"Think she's okay?"

"If she's making comments about a movie with William Holden, she's fine. She's just a little nervous."

"I guess I don't blame her. I didn't mean to make things so weird between us."

"Luke," she said seriously, "It was never you. Don't blame yourself for things that were always my fault." He didn't agree with her. He also didn't disagree with her. Silent Luke just poured Rory a cup of coffee. "Luke," she called to him. This was the right time to reintroduce Kate to the figure of her father. Lorelai stood and shuffled Kate to her hip, making her way behind the counter. Luke had cocked his head to the side when she called his name, but now turned his head, following her movements with his eyes. He could not look away from Kate, who was now eyeballing him suspiciously. In a few seconds, they were facing each other. He was keenly aware of what Lorelai wanted to do.

"Okay Kakers, I want you to meet someone who means a lot to Mommy. Well, he means a lot to you too. You met him before, but that was a long time ago, when you were just a tiny baby."

"Baby?" Kate questioned. Luke could sense Lorelai's nervousness. _Kids shouldn't have to be introduced to their father, _Luke thought. _If Lorelai wasn't there and I wasn't here, maybe things would be different. I mean, I think she knows my voice, but I can't expect that of her. _

"I'm not doing this right," Lorelai said more to Luke than to Kate. He felt certain boldness just then. It started in his knees, and then moved in a rush through the rest of his body. Here came the desire to take charge. He crouched down to be level with his daughter's eyes. Kate turned on Lorelai's hip to face him. She was now fascinated with this man.

"Katie," he began, using his special name for her, "You get to talk to your daddy on the phone sometimes, right?"

"Uh huh," Kate said in such a way that Luke wasn't sure if she understood or not. His short experience with toddlers had been in his diner and his weekly conversations with Kate. He felt very unprepared and inadequate with this type of situation. He looked to Lorelai for guidance. She, in turn, opened her mouth to speak.

"Honey, this is Luke, the man you talk to on the phone…your daddy. Do you remember the pictures I showed you of him?" Lorelai realized she was probably asking a lot of her daughter's still developing brain. Kate looked perplexed. It would probably be awhile before she understood the intensity of this moment.

"Oh," Kate finally said. Luke loudly let out the breath he had been holding in.

"Is that a good or bad reaction?" Luke muttered to Lorelai.

"It's how she usually responds to things. The two of you just need to spend more time together."

With that in mind, inspiration hit Lorelai. She thought of the one thing that would reassure Luke at this moment. She leaned over and whispered something into Kate's ear. She grinned, and then held her hands out to Luke to be picked up. He looked shocked, but responded quickly to his daughter's action. He leaned over and picked her up under her arms, awkwardly tucking his hand under his tush. Luke felt like such a dunce. He didn't even know the first thing about kids. The last time he held Kate she was only a few days old and needed every part of her body supported. Lorelai smiled at the way he held Kate, but he shot her a look. Kate stuck out her arm and patted Luke's stubble with her palm. That made her giggle. Then, she followed her mother's whispered directions and kissed Luke on the cheek. Lorelai witnessed Luke's face immediately soften as he wrapped his arms around Kate and kissed her forehead. He was overcome with thousands of thoughts. On the other side of the action, Lorelai knew she was never much of an emotional person. She tried to find the mockable humor in sappy situations. But, she wasn't surprised when she felt choked up. This was a stable reminder of why she was here. For Luke. She needed to give back to Luke every right he deserved as a father. He looked over at Lorelai at that moment.

"You're right," he said in a gruff whisper in Kate's curls, "I need to spend more time with her."

* * *

"_On the road again…" she couldn't get Willie Nelson's voice out of her head no matter how hard she tried. She even tried a medley of "Those Lazy, Hazy, Crazy Days of Summer," and the Small World song with no success. That was one man she didn't understand. Willie was enough of the mystery with the very irritating twangy stuff he sang, but the braids? And the bandanas? Was he stuck in the sixties? Did he really have Native American blood in him? And why in the world would you give beer to horses? _

_These Luke-like inner rants manifested the minute she left Boston. She had gotten up early, leaving a note of gratitude to Christopher. She still wasn't up to talk to him after her argument with Luke. She just needed to be alone. Lorelai was still unsure what had been resolved after their tiff. Sure, Luke told her everything would be okay and they both agreed that they didn't want to be a part, but so many things were up in the air. There was the fact that she went to see Christopher when she knew Luke would have a problem with it. There was also the fact that she had wanted to talk to Chris about Rory before she wanted to discuss it with Luke. Then, there was the fact that Luke accused her of not trusting him. To a certain extent, she agreed with him. She hadn't trusted him enough with Rory. What had happened to her complete and utter devotion and adoration of him the night she proposed? So many things had changed in a month. Oh, and there was also the fact that she originally called Luke to tell about the pregnancy. In the midst of all Luke's accusations, she still couldn't tell him. _

_Lorelai was more aware of the baby now. It was that feeling you get when you realize you have something, and then feel the side-effects. Like, you don't have cramps until you realize that you are on your period. She was sure Rory would say something about the psychological aspects of this idea. Her morning sickness had a reason. She understood why she had been so emotional lately. She did want to eat more. Apples. Apples sounded very appealing to her right then. Macintosh, or Granny Smith, or Gala. Oooo, Pink Lady! She could kill for a Pink Lady apple right then. _

_Stars Hollow was coming up. Once she passed Hartford, the scenery was second nature. But, she really wasn't paying attention like she should. How the hell was she going to tell Luke about the baby? It didn't seem like the perfect time to present him with baby-sized Nikes or tiny flannel shirts. Things weren't exactly hunky-dory with Luke yet. But, she didn't want it to sound like she didn't want this. Lorelai did. She really did. She already felt a special bond with this baby. She wasn't lying when she told Chris that she always wanted more children. Sure, she was depressed that Rory was not around to plan the perfect way to tell Luke that he was going to be a daddy. But, she needed to tell him, perfect way or not. Well, there was always the fail-safe, stopping by the record store and buying a copy of "You're Having My Baby." There's something about Paul Anka that makes you sit up and listen. _

_DAMN! She nearly screeched to a halt when she realized she passed the exit. This caused the tailgater behind her to swerve to the next lane. Well, no backing up now. She would have to take the next exit. Or did she? Lorelai was now in crazy idea mode. Never a good sign. No one was there to talk her out of anything._

_Lorelai needed time. She needed time to think about how things were going to work out with Luke. She needed time to think about what the baby would mean to their relationship. She needed time to sort out the Rory situation. She needed time to think about how to face her parents again without getting in a screaming match. She needed time away from the inn, and all-knowing Sookie, and concerned Luke, and the prying eyes of the town. She just needed time. She wasn't ready to face the world yet._

_Am I really doing this?_

_At that moment, Lorelai didn't want to think about consequences. It was the immature reaction, but it's what she wanted to do. When would she get this opportunity to drive into the vast unknown once the baby was born? She felt the jeers from an unknown outside crowd. 'Hey!' she called out to them, 'Haven't you ever wanted to do something so bad that you didn't want to think about the outcome? Haven't you ever wanted to get away from everything?...Yeah, I thought so.' The next exit crept up to her. Her hands on the wheel didn't budge. Her foot didn't lean toward the break. Am I really doing this? Crazy Lorelai took over. She pressed her foot harder on the gas and sped up. She reached for the cell phone in the cup holder and turned it off. Lorelai wasn't ready to face calls yet. She was still on vacation after all. _

* * *

Empty lunch plates lay in piles on the table. Kate still fingered her macaroni on the plate. Though it wasn't Luke's favorite dish to prepare, he would probably do anything for that little girl. She already had him wrapped around her finger.

"Full!" Rory groaned, head tilted back and staring at the ceiling. "I don't remember Luke's coffee, burgers, and fries being so filling."

"It's like it expanded in my stomach," Lorelai agreed with her daughter.

"Maybe your eating habits have finally caught up with you. Don't blame me if your arteries have clogged."

"Nope, I don't think that's it," Lorelai commented. Their pattern was nice. It would take a VERY long time before they could ever return to a normal friendship, but the banter was a reassuring sign.

"Could've been the thirds," Rory said absently.

"Hm, that rings a bell."

"Jeez," said Luke as he cleared the plates and refilled their coffee. "Don't pick up on their disgusting habits, Katie." The meal had changed a lot of things in a short while. Each minute that passed, Luke felt more comfortable around his daughter. He wanted this. He wanted to spend more time with her. This was a good sign.

"Alrighty, who's ready to go the park?" Lorelai stated, her fullness suddenly vacating her body.

"Kakers!" Kate said. She would sometimes call herself by her nickname.

"Rory?"

"Ugh."

"There's ice cream in store for the worthy participant."

"Then I'm game!" Rory said, jumping up fast.

"Do me a favor and don't feed Kate anymore this meal. You'll spoil her appetite," Luke said.

"How do you expect her to catch up with Gilmore greatness with that attitude?"

"I do not want her to pick up on unhealthy habits."

"Might be too late for that. Rory, take Kate over to Taylor's and I'll meet you there in a sec."

"We'll have to field town questions."

"That's why I'm making you go first." Rory scooped up Kate and headed out the door. Both girls waved at Lorelai and Luke. They were left alone again.

"Luke," she began, "I know it will take awhile for things to be normal between us, but I feel like things are already on the right path."

"I agree."

"Kate already seems to be taken with you."

"I've always been taken with her." Lorelai smiled.

"Do you want to go to the park with us? Or, we are kinda having an impromptu get-together tonight at my house. It's really an excuse to get people to unpack for me. You're welcome to come by."

"Uh, I probably shouldn't."

"I can see you're very busy." She mused, trying not to make it sound sarcastic

"I do have some things to do."

"Understandable. Well, you know where we are if you change your mind, or, you know, things suddenly get slow around here."

"Yeah, I do."

"I'll see you later?"

"Yeah," Lorelai picked up her purse and walked toward the door, "Lorelai," Luke called to her. She turned. "I'm glad you three are back…"

"Me too." The bell sounded and Lorelai met her daughters next door.

* * *

**A/N: So, I guess I should mention what I have changed in these first three chapters, lol. Well, for one, I decided that all my original chapter titles sucked. I got the brilliant idea to change them all to song titles, since I got the story title from a Carole King song (I'm not as Carole King obsessed as I seem, haha). So, I was browsing my song titles from my iTunes list and wrote down all the ones that seemed to pertain to the message I was trying to get across in this story. Well, being the slow blonde that I can be sometimes, I thought, 'huh, maybe some of the lyrics of these songs I chose would mean something to Luke and Lorelai's past or present.' There you have it. My new chapter titles and quotes in the beginning. **

**I also changed some of the sections that I was never satisfied with, so if you have reread my changes, thanks a ton!**

**Thanks for reading and reviewing. I couldn't get through this story without you guys. **


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